Sunday, August 12, 2012
A JOKE AND A DRINK....FREE MONDAY NIGHT COMEDY SHOW!!!
New weekly FREE comedy show. Simply RSVP at ajokeandadrink@gmail.com and you are on the list...Just come prepared to drink, laugh and have a ball. EVERY MONDAY starting 8.20.12 Hosted by ME...Kellye Howard
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Independently SELFISH Single mothers!
I have to often ask myself as a single parent. Am I doing everything humanly possible to ensure my daughters achievement in life? Am I emotionally preparing her for success? Am I physically preparing her for success? Are my words going in one ear and out the other, because my actions supersede anything I could possibly say to her? Have I become so engulfed in my own imperfections that teaching her to love herself for exactly who she is has become a minority to my priorities?
Being raised in a household where I was often ignored for more important things (i.e. anything but children), I have found it quite difficult to find a balance of how to raise my child without the overlapping anger from my childhood. While not growing up with both my parents simultaneously, I think I've developed a complex about the rights and wrongs of raising a child.
Yes, I am a single mother. Probably one of the most regretful actions of my entire life might I add. I know we as single women pride ourselves on being independent and holding our own while keeping a household, job, and raising children. Truth be told, are we making things harder for our children by being so I*N*D*E*P*E*N*D*E*N*T...do you know what mean?
I've never made it a priority to include my daughter's father in her life. I felt as though if he didn't want her, then why should I force him? And I can't necessary blame her existence on careless reckless dating tactics, as he and I were together for 2 years before she was even conceived. But honestly I guess I can admit the signs were there. I mean he never did for his first daughter....the one that I often bought clothes for and who's hair I combed within the early months of our dating excursion. Could I have been wiser with my frivolous sex acts? I think so.
But thats neither here nor there...because she is here, and I'm excited to have her...and I am raising her solo. So with that being said, what's next?
I've recently decided to search my own soul for the truth. The hidden self pity and self hatred that I developed when not being told how special I was at the early ages of life. Or maybe when I was not read to or helped with my homework. Can my daughter really expect me to do all these things, when I don't recall them ever being done for me?
Absolutely!
And regardless of what I did or did not have, it is my duty to be that parent to her. That parent that puts my life on hold to ensure she receives any and everything she needs to be successful and confident. See confidence is often overlooked. And this personality additive is actually very important in many of life's expeditions. Confidence is what tells you to walk away from an abusive relationship, or break up with someone who has cheated on you. Confidence is what pushes you closer and closer to your goals everyday of your life. Confidence is the little birdy that says don't do things that will slow you down unless you are ready to be slowed down.
I personally believe that when young girls are given the benefit of having the father consistently in her life, this creates that confidence that even a mother can't necessary give her. You see, a father is an example of what to tolerate or not tolerate from the opposite sex. If a young girl lacks this exposure, its just as bad as being tossed into Lake Michigan BEFORE she's taught to swim. (Very Dangerous).
A growing girl needs to see these good and even bad actions from her father to give her an ideology of expectations. Without this she can find herself searching for an example to follow, leading her down a path of many broken hearts, failed connections, and a loneliness she doesn't understand how to rid herself of.
So basically this rant was to say, you may pride yourself on being a SINGLE mother, but who is it really benefitting? I don't think the child is getting the best possible deal when one parent is deleted from his/her life because the other parent wants to prove her independence. Now if the relationship is abusive or not productive for the child...then that's a completely different thought. But I've seen many women make a mans job very hard to be in his child's life....which benefits no one but the selfish woman.
I am not that woman might I add. My daughter father chooses to omit himself on a continuous basis. And as a mother, I've decided not to embed the thoughts of broken promises in my daughters mind frame. In regards to the men that actually try, give them that right ladies. Its the only appropriate things to do...especially for the child. You are teaching that child responsibility, commitment, forgiveness, and sportsmanship....ALL in one simple act. Acceptance! :)
OK. I guess I'm done being serious. Carry on! :)
Being raised in a household where I was often ignored for more important things (i.e. anything but children), I have found it quite difficult to find a balance of how to raise my child without the overlapping anger from my childhood. While not growing up with both my parents simultaneously, I think I've developed a complex about the rights and wrongs of raising a child.
Yes, I am a single mother. Probably one of the most regretful actions of my entire life might I add. I know we as single women pride ourselves on being independent and holding our own while keeping a household, job, and raising children. Truth be told, are we making things harder for our children by being so I*N*D*E*P*E*N*D*E*N*T...do you know what mean?
I've never made it a priority to include my daughter's father in her life. I felt as though if he didn't want her, then why should I force him? And I can't necessary blame her existence on careless reckless dating tactics, as he and I were together for 2 years before she was even conceived. But honestly I guess I can admit the signs were there. I mean he never did for his first daughter....the one that I often bought clothes for and who's hair I combed within the early months of our dating excursion. Could I have been wiser with my frivolous sex acts? I think so.
But thats neither here nor there...because she is here, and I'm excited to have her...and I am raising her solo. So with that being said, what's next?
I've recently decided to search my own soul for the truth. The hidden self pity and self hatred that I developed when not being told how special I was at the early ages of life. Or maybe when I was not read to or helped with my homework. Can my daughter really expect me to do all these things, when I don't recall them ever being done for me?
Absolutely!
And regardless of what I did or did not have, it is my duty to be that parent to her. That parent that puts my life on hold to ensure she receives any and everything she needs to be successful and confident. See confidence is often overlooked. And this personality additive is actually very important in many of life's expeditions. Confidence is what tells you to walk away from an abusive relationship, or break up with someone who has cheated on you. Confidence is what pushes you closer and closer to your goals everyday of your life. Confidence is the little birdy that says don't do things that will slow you down unless you are ready to be slowed down.
I personally believe that when young girls are given the benefit of having the father consistently in her life, this creates that confidence that even a mother can't necessary give her. You see, a father is an example of what to tolerate or not tolerate from the opposite sex. If a young girl lacks this exposure, its just as bad as being tossed into Lake Michigan BEFORE she's taught to swim. (Very Dangerous).
A growing girl needs to see these good and even bad actions from her father to give her an ideology of expectations. Without this she can find herself searching for an example to follow, leading her down a path of many broken hearts, failed connections, and a loneliness she doesn't understand how to rid herself of.
So basically this rant was to say, you may pride yourself on being a SINGLE mother, but who is it really benefitting? I don't think the child is getting the best possible deal when one parent is deleted from his/her life because the other parent wants to prove her independence. Now if the relationship is abusive or not productive for the child...then that's a completely different thought. But I've seen many women make a mans job very hard to be in his child's life....which benefits no one but the selfish woman.
I am not that woman might I add. My daughter father chooses to omit himself on a continuous basis. And as a mother, I've decided not to embed the thoughts of broken promises in my daughters mind frame. In regards to the men that actually try, give them that right ladies. Its the only appropriate things to do...especially for the child. You are teaching that child responsibility, commitment, forgiveness, and sportsmanship....ALL in one simple act. Acceptance! :)
OK. I guess I'm done being serious. Carry on! :)
Monday, May 28, 2012
Kellye Howard presents Silly Saturdays...
I hope to see ALL my followers in the Chicago land area at this event...well until we reach capacity that is. I would hope to have more followers than what can fit in Outriggers...LOL!
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
No Hair, Don't Care!
THE BIG CHOP...has been done! Check out my video from the last 8 years of hair...well really 3 1/2, but I've natural since 2004..Check me out. I love the new look! :)
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Natural NEW Me..
Please watch the video...I'm starting all NEW, Even though I have been natural since 2004, I need a change of pace and trying to wear my hair out is not working because I've gotten it blow dried and straightened so much, therefore I am CUTTING IT OFF!
Friday, April 6, 2012
Juice Cleanse
Have you seen the movie "Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead"? Well...I have, and um, yeah...it made me rethink the way I eat...I usually don't give a damn what I eat, but after really thinking about how long I want to live and all the wonderful things I would like to do with my life, I felt as though a little change couldn't hurt. So...therefore I juice Monday thruThursday and I eat cautiously Friday, Saturday, and Sunday! :) Juicing means using all natural fruits and vegetables and putting them into a juicer, extracting the juice from them, and drinking just that! HELL YES...I am extremely hungry during this process...LOL! But it gets easier. Day 3 is usually smooth sailing. I drink "6" 16 ounce juices a day. Its actually a very refreshing feeling. I started this cleanse at 148 pounds and five days later I am 138.2. It seems unhealthy...I know! But its not. You are getting more than enough calories and nutrients in just the juice itself. Think of your great great great ancestors, that only food foraged for greens and berries...They survived, well technically they survived...I guess. Either way, its healthy. I wake up every morning at 6am...ish...LOL! I rest very well at night. This has actually been a great week. I think clearer, get more done in a day, and I am naturally energized. The taste of the juices are actually pretty good. It's a refreshing feeling...if I may reiterate that! So give it a try, and if that doesn't work, I've attached a video you can use to help you definitely NOT lose weight..LOL! :)
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Friday, March 23, 2012
A Return to Love
I thought this was a great start to a beautiful weekend. Believe in yourself and know that you are destine for greatness. I had a nice talk with a great business owner this morning, and she helped me remember some things I had forgotten. Never let go! Stay true to your heart and be great at whatever you choose to do in life. :) Enjoy this poem by Marianne Williamson from her book "A Return to Love"! Get it, read it, apply it to your life.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
10 Comic Commandments
Funny Video I came across today, and thought it was very befitting of the life of a comic. I love to see comedians using their creative energy in more ways than just the stage. Great job...well Done! Not that my kudos really hold any weight. But here...they got it anyways! :)
Change of Plans...
OK...So, I thought I was starting P90X today...Didn't work out that way. I forgot my pull up bar in the city, and didn't have any of the essentials needed to actually start the program. Did you know you needed supplements? Well I didn't. So I went running earlier. Did a few jump and jacks, and that was the extent of my workout today. I plan on starting soon. So stay posted. :-/ We can do this together! :)
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
P90X
Ok...I'm going to start the P90X training DVD and I am going to video blog my progress. Anyone that wants to join in is more than welcome. You can post your results, questions, and comments on my blog. I think we can achieve GREAT looking bodies in no time with persistence. Many people tell me all the time, "Girl you don't need to workout..." BULL...SH_ _! When you see me, I may look great in my clothes but underneath I got body parts tucked, taped, strapped, glued...LOL! I can definitely use a good consistent workout plan. And I'm going to start RIGHT HERE! So tomorrow, look for my before pics and entry video. We're gonna have a lot of fun. I will also post the nutrition guide for those of you who need to know what to eat! :)
Sunday, March 11, 2012
WTF???
WTF??? This is a real cake, that someone had made. And look at the title. Happy Birthday "PUBLIC AID HUSTLER". WOW! As a comedian this could possible be funny, as a tax paying citizen this is a poor display of pure ignorance. I wonder if thats their phone number displayed on the cake....hmm??? Lets make a call! Comment below, let me know what you think!
Friday, March 9, 2012
Kony 2012
I donated to this cause today, for several reasons. One of the main ones was because I would have given my lungs, heart, kidney, whatever for my child to live. Therefore I know what it feels like to be helpless. No matter what you do, say, or feel, you can't change the outcome. I am sure the parents of these abducted children experience similar emotions, if not worst.! Watch the video, make a difference. Share, post, change. My donation is in memory of Heaven Alise... R.I.P 11/12/10-02/22/12
Long Time...No Post! :-/
 |
| At home, after 10 months of hospitalization |
Thursday, December 17, 2009
In tears I write
Sometimes it just hurts so bad.. it burn so deep...
I can't eat.. I can't sleep...
To think I feel so cheap.. So misused.. so mistreated..
My mind is my biggest enemy for it torments my possibilities of happiness
I'm so emotionally exhausted, I just want to be held...WHY WONT ANYBODY HOLD ME
sometimes you're just tired.. sometimes you've had enough..
sometimes you just give up...sometimes it's just too tough.
God please make me better. please heal this pain
please comfort my thought.. keep me from going insane
i can barely see through my blurred vision for my eyes are so swollen, from my heart.. bit and pieces he has stolen
I never should have let him love me... I never should have even cared
i am emotionally dying for I've let myself go..what next is what i ask of you.. i cant see through the tunnel.
I'd like to believe this is God's way of preparing me for something more..
but at this very moment.. all i can see is the other side of this closed door.
its right here.. its so close.. its hurts to even stare. but i cant turn around and go backwards for there's even pain back there..
i just want to go to sleep and pretend he doesn't exist.. i just want to take an extended nap and when i wake pray it wont be of this.
i cant believe I'm here again, in this same place.. same room.. crying angrily, i've been raped willingly!
the ending of this pain is the ending of my life.
I can't eat.. I can't sleep...
To think I feel so cheap.. So misused.. so mistreated..
My mind is my biggest enemy for it torments my possibilities of happiness
I'm so emotionally exhausted, I just want to be held...WHY WONT ANYBODY HOLD ME
sometimes you're just tired.. sometimes you've had enough..
sometimes you just give up...sometimes it's just too tough.
God please make me better. please heal this pain
please comfort my thought.. keep me from going insane
i can barely see through my blurred vision for my eyes are so swollen, from my heart.. bit and pieces he has stolen
I never should have let him love me... I never should have even cared
i am emotionally dying for I've let myself go..what next is what i ask of you.. i cant see through the tunnel.
I'd like to believe this is God's way of preparing me for something more..
but at this very moment.. all i can see is the other side of this closed door.
its right here.. its so close.. its hurts to even stare. but i cant turn around and go backwards for there's even pain back there..
i just want to go to sleep and pretend he doesn't exist.. i just want to take an extended nap and when i wake pray it wont be of this.
i cant believe I'm here again, in this same place.. same room.. crying angrily, i've been raped willingly!
the ending of this pain is the ending of my life.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Piety Love
You can't just forget my existence.
I was there, you felt me, you thrust inside of me. I exist. I am real.
Though you deleted my profile, and changed my name, blocked request, as I did the same.
I am real. I exist.
You can't delete the memories of my lips exploring your highest pleasure points.
You can't remove the mark I stitched into your soul, with my gentle stokes upon your aching temple.
I am real. I exist.
This. Us. You. Me.
Her. Him. Them. We
It was real! The irreversible, undeniable sensation felt at your finger tips with every notion of my presence.
Dare you desert the soul-ship we've sailed.
Have we failed!
We were assigned to one another to change the unchangeable. To motivate, implicate, and exude sourceless satisfaction to the non-convinced. The Spiritually dense!
Have we failed to complete the energy surge, merged between our bodies.
There's a disconnection that requires immediate attention, for if not the world will suffer.
This unity is the love like buffer, it heals thee. both you and me.
Leave not for I am distraught, but because with we.. He will bless-ed our souls ever more. Lets not end Sore!
I was there, you felt me, you thrust inside of me. I exist. I am real.
Though you deleted my profile, and changed my name, blocked request, as I did the same.
I am real. I exist.
You can't delete the memories of my lips exploring your highest pleasure points.
You can't remove the mark I stitched into your soul, with my gentle stokes upon your aching temple.
I am real. I exist.
This. Us. You. Me.
Her. Him. Them. We
It was real! The irreversible, undeniable sensation felt at your finger tips with every notion of my presence.
Dare you desert the soul-ship we've sailed.
Have we failed!
We were assigned to one another to change the unchangeable. To motivate, implicate, and exude sourceless satisfaction to the non-convinced. The Spiritually dense!
Have we failed to complete the energy surge, merged between our bodies.
There's a disconnection that requires immediate attention, for if not the world will suffer.
This unity is the love like buffer, it heals thee. both you and me.
Leave not for I am distraught, but because with we.. He will bless-ed our souls ever more. Lets not end Sore!
Monday, December 14, 2009
It's NOT about ME!
I'm here at this place...All by myself in the physical sense, YET I'VE REALIZED....IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
The ways of the world, the struggles of peace.
The flaws of the church, the ease of deceit.
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
The unfed children, and abused young girls
The imprisoned men, the ways of this world.
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
The greed, the sex, the money, the cars.
The hypocrites, the liars, the emotional guards.
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
The wars, the fights, and battles of the night
The judicial corruption, and political ties,
The financial obligations, and corporate lies
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
Lay down in my thoughts, beneath the soil of my imperfections.
I can change the ways of the world.
God gave me this world and assigned to me to be a finger of his hand that connects to his wrist which connect to his arm, that connects to his shoulder...All being a part of God's body. This world is not about me...
Its about US!
Our connection to spirit as a whole can transform the way of the world.
Every little boy and every little girl.
Every MAN, every WOMAN. Stand proud. For you are an essential part of the spirit, you are the change, you are a piece of me, and I am too a piece of you.
We are the ways of the world...
The ways of the world, the struggles of peace.
The flaws of the church, the ease of deceit.
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
The unfed children, and abused young girls
The imprisoned men, the ways of this world.
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
The greed, the sex, the money, the cars.
The hypocrites, the liars, the emotional guards.
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
The wars, the fights, and battles of the night
The judicial corruption, and political ties,
The financial obligations, and corporate lies
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!
Lay down in my thoughts, beneath the soil of my imperfections.
I can change the ways of the world.
God gave me this world and assigned to me to be a finger of his hand that connects to his wrist which connect to his arm, that connects to his shoulder...All being a part of God's body. This world is not about me...
Its about US!
Our connection to spirit as a whole can transform the way of the world.
Every little boy and every little girl.
Every MAN, every WOMAN. Stand proud. For you are an essential part of the spirit, you are the change, you are a piece of me, and I am too a piece of you.
We are the ways of the world...
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
No Closing for an endless LOVE...
I'm pretending to not care to try and retain my sanity and freedom too.
But reality is at this point the silence is death defying
I'd rather go insane for you.
Just to have you in my life, to know that the essence of our thoughts are connected on some level would balance this scale of confusion.
The rejection I've had to endure from the lack of your being here
has put me in total and irreversible delusion
I'd take the timed medication and sleep in a padded room with no shoestrings in my shoes.
Just to know during visiting hours I'd be graced with the presence of you
The emotional draw I feel is so magnetic, so powerful, so robust,
Enticing, and overwhelming, God grant me the days when life was just US!
The NEW days, and beginning nervous sweats
The first kisses and endless sex
The moments after when lying on your chest
And deep rooted conversations which helped me learn you best.
The "Love is" situational responses and
pauses throughout the day
To just wonder...and ponder...and have intimacy replayed
I promise Lord to protect your angels heart.
I promise to Love you first, then love him so we never grow apart.
Oh baby Your smile, your laugh, your scent
The memories are to intense to bare
Tell me, what do I need to do oh Lord to have him here.
Next to me!!!
You put him in my life, don't take him away,
what needs to be done? what do I need to say?
Guide me, this roller coaster of emotions has become sickening
This silence I've enforce is mentally reckoning.
I have no closing for this can't be the end
I have no closing til I receive that text...Love is....huh?!?! Or be it just a Friend!
But reality is at this point the silence is death defying
I'd rather go insane for you.
Just to have you in my life, to know that the essence of our thoughts are connected on some level would balance this scale of confusion.
The rejection I've had to endure from the lack of your being here
has put me in total and irreversible delusion
I'd take the timed medication and sleep in a padded room with no shoestrings in my shoes.
Just to know during visiting hours I'd be graced with the presence of you
The emotional draw I feel is so magnetic, so powerful, so robust,
Enticing, and overwhelming, God grant me the days when life was just US!
The NEW days, and beginning nervous sweats
The first kisses and endless sex
The moments after when lying on your chest
And deep rooted conversations which helped me learn you best.
The "Love is" situational responses and
pauses throughout the day
To just wonder...and ponder...and have intimacy replayed
I promise Lord to protect your angels heart.
I promise to Love you first, then love him so we never grow apart.
Oh baby Your smile, your laugh, your scent
The memories are to intense to bare
Tell me, what do I need to do oh Lord to have him here.
Next to me!!!
You put him in my life, don't take him away,
what needs to be done? what do I need to say?
Guide me, this roller coaster of emotions has become sickening
This silence I've enforce is mentally reckoning.
I have no closing for this can't be the end
I have no closing til I receive that text...Love is....huh?!?! Or be it just a Friend!
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